Over Thanksgiving, I went to see my daughter and her family in Sarasota. My daughter and I had a difficult relationship when she was a teen. She hated me, and blamed me for everything that was wrong in her life. I did screw up royally a couple of times, as in my choice of a first husband, etc., but overall I did the best I could with what I had and really didn't deserve her hate.

Over time, and her growing up, and me mellowing out a bit, and living apart for a couple of years, she grew to hate me less, and now we have a very good relationship. I give her advice, and she takes it or leaves it as she sees fit, and I understand and respect that.

What struck me most about her in this last visit is how much she's matured. My daughter, when she was young, didn't do things that were difficult. If she had a cough, she skipped school. If she was tired, she blew off whatever she had planned (like school). She was pretty lazy about school work, or any kind of work. Now that is living on her own, married, with a little boy, she is really stepping up to the plate. This is particularly apparent with her job. She is pregnant, and feeling pretty crappy most of the time. She throws up twice daily, is tired and has very little energy. She spends all day taking care of her little son, and then, five days a week, goes to a crummy job where she's on her feet for eight hours. She's stressed and fatigued. But they need the money, so even though she doesn't feel like it, she goes.

Just like a grownup.