Not Ready for Prime Time?
Little Boy is a little boy. He is a young five-and-one-half year-old. He's somewhat immature; still given to occasional meltdowns over minor things. He is very bright, but not confident. His coping skills are not well developed. He is likely to freak out over a broken pencil, rather than just getting another one.
This information was definitely not in the forefront of my brain before Wednesday, when DH and I had a conference with Little Boy's teacher. She emphasized that he is bright, sweet, kind, and has many friends. But his fine motor skills are not quite where they ought to be, and he's not as mature as some of the other kids in his class. He's a summer birthday, so he's one of the youngest in his class. We didn't even consider keeping him back a year, though, because public education is free, and being the youngest in his class didn't seem to bother Older Son even a little bit.
His teacher mentioned to us the possibility that he might be recommended for a smaller, transitional first grade class ("T1") for other kids like Little Boy. That is, kids of normal or better intelligence, with no learning disabilities and no behavioral problems, who just aren't ready for the more arduous work of first grade. It's a smaller class (12-15 students), and the curriculum is first grade, but more "play based." It sounds wonderful, but unfortunately, they do not also have "T2" and "T3." After a year of "T1," he would go into a regular first grade class. It doesn't show as a retention on his record, and it would let him enter the world of "real" school ahead of the game instead of behind.
I contrast this with Older Son's elementary experience. He went to an informal school in grades K-5. They had "family" groupings of grades - K-1, K-1-2, 1-2, 2-3, etc. Especially in the early grades, this was ideal for him. The curriculum was highly individualized - he was always working at his own pace. Even if he wasn't quite as "mature" as some of his grade peers, there was such a mix of maturity levels that it didn't matter much. His social and emotional development caught up with the kids in his own grade within a few years, but he didn't need an extra year of school to achieve that outcome.
Unfortunately, there's no school like that available here. We won't know whether "T1" will be the best option for Little Boy for a couple of months, but if it's offered, we need to seriously consider it. It seems the only alternative is to throw him in with the sharks and hope he learns to swim.
I recognize that any decisions about this option, should they come about, would need to be made based on what's best for Little Boy. Still, I can't help thinking that I've failed him in some way.
This information was definitely not in the forefront of my brain before Wednesday, when DH and I had a conference with Little Boy's teacher. She emphasized that he is bright, sweet, kind, and has many friends. But his fine motor skills are not quite where they ought to be, and he's not as mature as some of the other kids in his class. He's a summer birthday, so he's one of the youngest in his class. We didn't even consider keeping him back a year, though, because public education is free, and being the youngest in his class didn't seem to bother Older Son even a little bit.
His teacher mentioned to us the possibility that he might be recommended for a smaller, transitional first grade class ("T1") for other kids like Little Boy. That is, kids of normal or better intelligence, with no learning disabilities and no behavioral problems, who just aren't ready for the more arduous work of first grade. It's a smaller class (12-15 students), and the curriculum is first grade, but more "play based." It sounds wonderful, but unfortunately, they do not also have "T2" and "T3." After a year of "T1," he would go into a regular first grade class. It doesn't show as a retention on his record, and it would let him enter the world of "real" school ahead of the game instead of behind.
I contrast this with Older Son's elementary experience. He went to an informal school in grades K-5. They had "family" groupings of grades - K-1, K-1-2, 1-2, 2-3, etc. Especially in the early grades, this was ideal for him. The curriculum was highly individualized - he was always working at his own pace. Even if he wasn't quite as "mature" as some of his grade peers, there was such a mix of maturity levels that it didn't matter much. His social and emotional development caught up with the kids in his own grade within a few years, but he didn't need an extra year of school to achieve that outcome.
Unfortunately, there's no school like that available here. We won't know whether "T1" will be the best option for Little Boy for a couple of months, but if it's offered, we need to seriously consider it. It seems the only alternative is to throw him in with the sharks and hope he learns to swim.
I recognize that any decisions about this option, should they come about, would need to be made based on what's best for Little Boy. Still, I can't help thinking that I've failed him in some way.
2 Comments:
You haven't failed a bit. Its hard to believe that sometimes though. I've been through the wringer with my older son. This semester he brought home F's in three of his five core academic classes. He rounded out that steller performance with a D in reading(!!!!) and a B in Language Arts. This kid is really, really bright. He reads adult books with ease. He loves school, but couldn't seem to turn anything in. And he's the kind of kid that learns by doing so if he's not doing his homework, he's lost on the tests.
My daughter is at the top of her class in math and in the remedial reading group. She also has a very hard time with her handwriting. It can take her two hours to finish her homework most evenings. I have found out that she can be helped tremendously with Occupational Therapy. The school is going to do the initial evaluation. Since she's bright, they will deny her services in district, but I can take that evaluation (minus the findings) to this very excellent children's OT center around here and save $400 on the evaluation.
Brandon has had speech therapy this past year. Anyway, all my kids have had their challenges and I just try to help them fix them and to be the best they can be. Jeremy is in the academic support program and has been doing much better. He's had some home issues that I am in the middle of fixing and that has helped out too.
Can you see what the first grade classroom would be like before having to decide? Maybe he just needs a little outside school intervention rather than a whole year of intervention? Just thinking out loud. You know your little guy better than I do.
In my unesteemed opinion, Ann, whatever the choice it will indeedy work in the end. Because love never fails.
Note: I write about love never failing for having read your many thoughts about your family. Yep, it's love.
Willing you a gift from stress at this early point in his sweet life, and your own. xo
Debbie
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