Anniversary

Tomorrow, it will be a year.

It's still a long, long way from normal.

I guess we just need to get used to a new normal.

Early Start

This morning I woke up about 5:00. I got up for a few minutes to make myself comfortable, and then laid down to go back to sleep. I tossed and turned for about 45 minutes, but I couldn't sleep. I was obsessing about work. All the stuff I have to do. The endless to do list of 9.9 priorities. The schedule that fills as I attack it.

I decided if I was going to obsess about work, I might as well get paid for it. So I sat down at 6:00 in my nightgown and got to work. I knocked off for 45 minutes at 8:30 to shower, dress and have breakfast. I knocked off again at 1:00 for 45 minutes for lunch and recreational interneting. I knocked off for the day at 5:15. In one day I managed to cover my shortfall from the optometrist visit last week plus bank an hour for an early out tomorrow.

I bet I sleep well and early tonight.

Helping DH Move

My husband moved offices. Some of the faculty did not return, and some of them had much nicer offices than his. Prior to the end of the semester, he identified the office he wanted. During the first week of his luxurious three-week summer he painted the new office a nice crisp white with a green horizontal bar painted at chair rail height.

The office has been pretty much ready to occupy since Friday, except that he wanted to move a desk in from another office. So after lunch, I asked if he'd like to go in and get the desks moved around. I think he was a little surprised, but he took me up on it. It took us about an hour to move the desks (Steelcase desks are heavy), then we set up his computer. The internet didn't connect immediately, but I fixed it because I'm multi-talented like that. He's all setup to begin moving in for real now.

The space is SO much nicer than his old office. It's about 50% larger with high ceilings and a nice sized window. Natural light! He has a narrow closet with shelves and a deep cupboard at floor level for storage. He dragged in two five-shelf bookcases and painted the existing wall-mounted bookshelves green to match the chair rail strip, so he has lots of space for his books and journals.

The location is also much better. His former office was at the intersection of two hallways, where students were always stopping to ask non-biology questions like, "Do you know where Mr. C. is?" or "Can I borrow your stapler?" or "My advisor isn't in - will you sign my advising card?" The new office is in the suite of offices that used to be the department offices. He's behind two doors. People won't be bothering him unless they are looking for him.

I think environment is really important, and this is a much more pleasant environment. I'm glad I went in to see it. It's nice visualizing him there during the work day.

The Schedule

Last week, I watched a TV show that I hadn't expected to see, and heard a song I'd never heard before. It made me think how much I miss having music as a part of my life. I used to sing a lot, but as I've been more disengaged from my church (and belonged to congregations where the choir wasn't such a big thing) there hasn't been as music around me.

My husband and I talked later about some of the many things we would like to do that we can't. Things like exercise, and playtime with Little Boy, and doing stuff with other people. He made a list of his stuff, and I added my stuff to it. Then, we made a schedule.

Today's the second day, and we're already off track.

However, I'm not too worried about it. We've got more "top of mind" awareness of what things we think are important, and we've managed to get those things in, sort of. But I think it's also important to allow for the spontaneous "the Orioles are on!" experiences, too.

Do I write the same post every time I come to work in the office?

Every time I come to work in the office, I'm fried at the end of the day. Every single time.

I came in with about ten items ranked 9.9 on my to-do list. I completed a few more than that, and I have 15 left. I demoted some of my 9.9's to 9.8 just as a pragmatic matter.

I don't know how people who work with other people get anything done. Between the phones and the co-workers and the new to do's flying in...I'm wound so tight I can barely move my head.

I'm going home tomorrow.

My mom had a really good week. Her spontaneous speech is more varied than it used to be. She is still not able to take the ideas in her brain and turn them into speech. Gosh, I miss talking to my mom. Yeah, I know, there are other ways of communicating and stuff, but they aren't the same.

Thinking about shutting down for a while

So, would anybody notice? I blog other places, and comment other places. I guess Lynda would notice; I'd just have to e-mail more often, wouldn't I honey?

When I was out of work, or going to school, or suicidal, or evacuating from a hurricane, I had interesting things to write about. My life is so hum-drum now. I'm going to Ohio for a week next week, but I'm going to work while I'm there, just like I do every day. The only thing really absolutely top notch indescribably amazing about my life is my sex life, and that's way more information than any of you want to know, I'm sure.

Maybe it would be good if I was more passionate about things, and more expressive in my writing about those things. It's probably a result of all those years of programming. If Then Else and Select Case Default and Do While Loop Exit End and For Next don't leave a lot of room for nuanced expression. The goal is specific and concise.

I'd been reading Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott, and was really excited about writing for a while. Blogging seems to dissipate my discipline to write. I can just babble on the internet and don't have to develop characters or set scenes. My writing skill is adequate to the task at hand, so I don't stretch or push or try to make something "more" of it. Maybe if I focus my writing elsewhere for a while I'll feel pushed to stretch myself. Then again, maybe I'll just play Collapse and Spider Solitaire.